USA forges ahead with ambitious plans for new world-ending plague of measles.

Science and Tech, World News
USA forges ahead with ambitious plans for new world-ending plague. Measles

There have been over 760 confirmed cases of the measles reported this year in the USA, according to the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

This is a bold first step in their controversial plan to eradicate half of the human race by 2025: The Plague Plan. “It’s going to take a lot of hard work, but with public support so strong we are confident that together we can kill half the population by the deadline,” said officials. And the public certainly seem to be supportive, as they make full use of the

total of 47 US states that currently allow non-medical vaccine exemptions.

“We still hope that West Virginia, Mississippi and California will eventually allow potential lethal and arbitrary exemptions as well,” a spokesman said, adding, “but in such a case as this with 47 states vs 3, it’s easy to see who the winners are.” If the three states indeed do continue to oppose the spread of completely preventable and debilitating diseases, human carriers will be brought into the most populated areas and told to lurk around the local Target and Costco, shaking hands with people.

Measles was declared eliminated in the USA in the year 2,000, with this year having the highest number of confirmed cases since then.

Supporters of The Plague Plan argue that this shows just how much can be done with previously eliminated diseases in a short amount of time when you have the right marketing campaign. For example,

earlier this week a Texas lawmaker called scientific research on vaccine development, “sorcery”.

This comment was enthusiastically backed by proponents of The Plague Plan, as it plays on the rhetoric of the manipulative, the fears of the suspicious and the vulnerability of the uneducated, “which is pretty much the sweet spot in terms of getting support for something so mind-blowingly stupid,” a Plague Plan supporter argued. “If our politicians can keep talking about magic and religion rather than facts and science, I think we will easily have our devastating plague in place and doing what it does best by the 2025 deadline. No pun intended.”

  •   
  •  
  •  
  •  
  •  
  •  
  •  

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.