Uber gets 15 month license extension. Oh hang on, now it’s 18 months. No – 3. Shit, now they’ve cancelled. Oh it’s ok – I’ve got a new guy. Now he’s cancelled too…!

Business, Features, Travel

Overturning TFL’s decision to revoke Uber’s license in London, Magistrates gave the ride-hailing platform a temporary 15 month license.

Oh hang on, now it’s 18 months. No – now it’s only 3. Shit – now they’ve cancelled it. Oh, it’s ok – I’ve got a new guy. Oh no – he’s cancelled too…!!

The general secretary of the Licensed Taxi Driver’s Association said “The justice system has failed Londoners today”.

And he’s right – they have. As a Londoner, I’m absolutely gutted that my right to have no other option but to spend £50 on a taxi after a night out has been taken away from me. Damn you TFL!!!

Elsewhere in London, an Orthodox Jewish secondary school was put on probation for censoring it’s textbooks. Photographs containing men and women together in public had been redacted, pictures showing bare skin on ankles wrists and necks had been coloured in, and chapters in certain history books had been stuck together.

And it wasn’t with glue. That Rabbi LOVES history. Like, really loves it…

The chair of governors hit back at Ofsted, claiming they had “downplayed [the school’s] successes and achievements.”

Does he mean their achievement in keeping students as shielded as possible from the horrors of the real world? Or the cock and balls the rabbi drew next to the now-much-more tasteful picture of Winston Churchill’s neck?

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Adam Hunt

Written By: Adam Hunt

TV Producer (The One Show, Big Brother, Mel and Sue), Comedy Writer (Sitcoms and Sketches in development), Founder member of 'A Better Kind Of Funny', and creator of The News Dump.
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