Trump throws toys out of pram over funding bills. Ends up building wall.

Popular Right Now, UK Politics, World News
Trump throws toys out of pram over wall - accidentally builds his own

The Democrat-controlled US House of Representatives has voted to end a partial government shutdown – but the move looks certain to be vetoed by President Donald Trump as the bills don’t include any funding for his wall.

An island of cool whilst all around him run around screaming trying to deal with said island of cool, Mr Trump methodically threw toy after toy out of his pram, whilst his daughter and son-in-law kept bringing an infinite supply of toys in so he could continue until the toys – ironically – formed an enormous wall between him and Nancy Pelosi.

Mr Trump has said he will reject any measure that does not provide funding for his proposed US-Mexico border wall.

Trump complained that he wanted his own wall, stating that Emperor Hadrian got a wall, why can’t I have a wall and that if a penguin gets his own wall, he should have one too.

When asked, facetiously, what he wanted the wall to be called, he said, “I dunno.  The Really, Really Great – So Great – Wall?”

New House of Representatives Speaker Nancy Pelosi branded the wall “an immorality”.

The angel on Trump’s right shoulder would normally have been able to translate this for him, but she’s currently unable to, having been bound and gagged as the Robert Mercer-shaped devil on his left shoulder constantly hits her with a big stick.

The measures would also require the approval of the Republican-run Senate which senators have already ruled out.

A fact making everyone wonder why this is being reported as news at all, as nothing will happen.

Senate majority leader Mitch McConnell said Republicans there would not back measures that Mr Trump did not support.

Showing them to be the lily-livered ‘Yes Men’ (we’d ordinarily say ‘and women’ but that’s invariably not true of old Republicans) that Trump has consistently had in his life after being gifted a large amount of money by his dad.  Probably to go away.

Senator McConnell also called the Democrats’ move a “total nonstarter” and a “political sideshow”.

Interesting, as Political Sideshow is an exact description of how Donald Trump runs his Presidency.

Mr Trump has forced a government shutdown as he tries to generate funding for his wall.

A wall that will keep out all immigrants to the South.

Those without ladders, at least.

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