A supporter of US President Donald Trump attacked a BBC cameraman at a campaign rally in El Paso, Texas. Sporting a ‘Make America Great Again’ cap, the man shoved and swore at the BBC’s Ron Skeans before being pulled away.
“As soon as I heard the name I knew it was him,” yelled the assailant, Bubba Proudfart, “I’ve seen that b*stard’s name in the show’s credits every week. People like him should be strung up by their balls. He’s an enabler in my book, and deserves a good twatting. Have you ever watched EastEnders? It’s rubbish! It’s nothing but one long never ending argument, and has been since the first episode was broadcast in February 1985. It’s depressing for us red necks, and runs contrary to our cultural upbringing. We always look for the good in people and are first to find a compromise in a conflict situation.”
From the lectern Trump watched the attack and confirmed the supporter’s actions were welcomed by giving the ‘thumbs up’ after it happened.
“I couldn’t agree more with Bubba,” said Trump in an interview after the rally, “EastEnders is a pile of shite. I can’t get Melania to stop watching it though. When we’re in bed after a hard day’s ruining the free world all I want is a quick fumble followed by a good night’s zizz, but all I get is ‘her indoors’ banging on about who’s gonna ‘have a little word’ with whom. I wouldn’t mind if it had a decent story line, but it’s never-ending pants. Never mind giving the cameraman a slap, if I had my way I’d nuke the BBC. They’ve got a lot to answer for. There’s Countryfile for a start! When are they gonna give John Craven a set of teeth that fit?”