A furious Sajid Javid confronted Boris Johnson on Friday and demanded an explanation as to why his media adviser Sonia Khan was sacked without his knowledge, amid claims that a deep “culture of fear” has taken hold within the government.
With a grin Boris Johnson told Sajid Javid if he didn’t like it to take it up with his strategist Dominic Cummings. According to sources Javid is said to have gulped and muttered under his breath “the Great Bus Deceiver? I dare not” before slowly backing away.
At this point Cummings entered holding the leads of three wildly barking Dobermans. “Don’t be scared Sajid” Cummings said softly, as Javid cowered in the corner, “these are just the new party Whips I’ve hired. Everyone likes dogs right?”
A former Whitehall staffer who worked under Theresa May’s administration said “There is a now a climate of fear operating in government that Dominic Cummings is trying to create. The fact they had her marched out the front door by a police officer – they clearly wanted to make an example of her”.
We asked the former staffer to expand on their comments, but they seem to have disappeared without a trace. We asked Cummings if he knew anything of the disappearance, but he just shrugged and fed his Dobermans a new, extra meaty dog-food. “Made an example out of her did we?” Cummings spat, “well, see what we have made out of you!”
In comments confirmed by two sources to the Guardian, Cummings told a group of special advisers that anyone who didn’t like his management style could “fuck off”.
Cummings denies this accusation. “I never said they could ‘fuck off’, how crass. I said that if anyone didn’t like my management style that I’d bury them and their entire family so deep not even the worms will get to them. That’s not evidence of a culture of fear, it’s a good motivational pep talk”.