The Paris Riots. More PR Coup than Coup d’état.


Rioters in Paris have again marched and set cars alight in continuing protests.

While ‘officially’ the rioters are taking a stand against rising taxes and Macron’s regime, unofficial sources have confirmed this is more PR coup than coup d’état – as Parisians on all sides unite in an attempt to shed their old-fashioned ‘city of love’ image.

“Who wants to visit a place famous for being the world’s city of love’ anyway, when the very concept of ‘love’ has been tarnished by shows such as Love Island, and reduced to the image of two gym addicts rutting away like rabbits?” said a spokesman from  ‘Le Chat PR’ – the French PR firm behind the campaign.

Earlier, tear gas and rubber bullets were fired by officers as protesters stormed towards steel barriers and police trucks stationed outside the presidential palace.

Parts of central Paris were placed on lockdown – allowing rioters free reign to repeat their actions from a week ago which damaged a major monument and injured 130 people.

Officials and rioters are working together – in the hope that such a back and forth will only go further to cement Paris’ new reputation as the definitive ‘City of Adrenaline’, where tourists can visit in the hope of enjoying a sustained high heart rate and the possibility of physical injury.

One city spokesperson remarked: ‘This will surely put Paris firmly back on the map as the ideal destination for couples looking to spice up their relationship. Nothing draws a couple closer together than the joy of torching a police car or dodging rubber bullets. Far better for a relationship than a traditional dirty weekend, which is so 1990s.”

Pete Redfern

Written By: Pete Redfern

Pete has written for various satire sites and hails from Berkshire, where he lives with his wife and two children. Despite looking like a hooligan, Pete has little interest in either football or violence, and instead spends his spare time trying to make people laugh on the internet, mostly unsuccessfully.
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