SNP formally backs decriminalisation of drugs
Entrepreneurs, the SNP who are desperately trying to build momentum for #indyref have hit on a brilliant way to quickly boost the Scottish Economy; legalise drugs!
Suddenly a good proportion of the population, who are currently labelled criminals can now emerge as a entrepreneurs!
Everyone agrees that drugs are bad, the problem is that a lot of people also agree that drugs are really fun.
Once news gets out that you can buy Charlie at Lidl in Partick the floodgates are expected to open to drug tourists from all over the globe.
The tourist board are already looking at slogans like ‘Get High in Skye’, ‘Backpack with smack’ or even ‘Get messy with Nessie’.
At its conference in Aberdeen, a resolution was unanimously passed by delegates
All the delegates voted for this idea, well apart from the ones enjoying a crafty joint out the back of the venue.
Off the back of this idea, SNP delicates have been miraculously been offered trade deals by such exotic countries as Afghanistan, Columbia and Mexico.
The party are seeing this as a win win.
However, the monks of Buckfast Abbey in Devonshire have joined with the makers of Tennant’s Super in an attempt to boycott such legislation as it’s gonna destroy their business.
‘We had a monopoly on getting fucked’ said a spokesperson from Tennant’s. ‘Now it’s us who’s being fucked!’