Raab eliminated in the latest round of Ip Dip Tory

UK Politics
Raab eliminated in the latest round of Ip Dip Tory

Dominic Raab has been eliminated from the race to replace Theresa May,

following the latest round of Ip Dip Tory.

The former Brexit Secretary thought he was safe after Boris Johnson’s ‘out you must go’ ended on Jeremy Hunt, but when Boris added another line, the fickle finger of fuck off was pointing firmly at Raab who was left with no choice but to exit the race.

The surviving five candidates went on to appear on a live TV debate on BBC1 where they faced questions from the public.

Opinion is divided on whether there was a clear winner of the debate but Sajid Javid was generally considered to be the biggest loser after he forgot his suit and had to take part in the debate in just his vest and pants.

Rory Stewart had to be told to quieten down on a number of occasions and was eventually made to stand in the corner and face the wall while the other boys were allowed to continue the debate without him.

Another candidate will be eliminated on Wednesday.

As the current favourite Boris Johnson will once again be in charge of making up the rhyme. Sources close to the former London Mayor say he plans to go with the ‘Ip Dip Dog Shit’ variation of the game as it allows him to rhyme with ‘Brexit’ and ‘fix it’. Whether he is able to organise Brexit or fix anything is yet to be determined, but the consensus among voters is that, whatever the outcome, the next Prime Minister will definitely be dog shit.

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