Prince William has been given a new title by The Queen as his brother prepares to step back from royal duties.
In a statement The Queen said, ‘Henceforth, the talented and handsome Prince William, Duke of Cambridge, second heir to the throne, dedicated air ambulance pilot and all round top bloke, will be known as “Favourite Grandson” and will be entitled to wealth and riches worthy of someone who isn’t a turncoat and a traitor to his royal roots.’
The role of ‘Favourite Grandson’ was established by the Queen Mother, a renowned judge of character who, at the birth of Prince Andrew stated, ‘He looks like a wrong un’ and immediately announced Charles as favourite.
Previous incumbents of William’s new role include Prince Andrew and Prince Edward.
Appointments which The Queen said were down to her mother’s ‘fondness for gin.’
William will now be given a bigger share of the estate, while Harry and ‘that American bitch’ will be given a ‘pair of snow boots each and an English-French dictionary’ as they prepare for life in Canada.
William said he was ‘delighted’ to be given the honour of being named ‘Favourite Grandson’ and he intends to carry it out to the best of his ability and by ‘constantly pulling faces to wind up Harry and try getting him in trouble.’