‘Prince’ Andrew’s Pizza refuses to co-operate with the FBI

The Royals
'Prince' Andrew's Pizza refuses to co-operate with the FBI

It is reported that Prince Andrew is not cooperating with the FBI in relation to the sexual offences of the late Jeffery Epstein

But it doesn’t end there as the Pizza the ‘Duke’ of York claims to have met with (at a branch of Pizza Express in Woking) on the evening he was accused of meeting teenager Virginia Giuffre (formally Roberts) at the house of Ghislaine Maxwell, has also refused to cooperate with the Federal Bureau of Intelligence.

In a November 2019 interview with BBC’s Emily Maitlis, the Duke of York claimed that on the evening of the 10th March 2001, he was at home after attending a Party at the Woking Branch of the Pizza Express

“Tracking down the Pizza was tough work”, stated FBI investigator Detective Colin Finklestein (54) of Barton Stacey, New Jersey, “At first we thought the ‘Duke’ was more of an ‘American Hot’ type of guy, but that lead just took us down a dead end. We completely ruled out the charitable ‘Veneziana’ from day one, but it was when one of the guys at the bureau mentioned he had seconds of a ‘Sloppy Giuseppe’ did we really start to nail down the Pizza’s identity and put two and two together”

Prince Andrew says he did not see or suspect, any suspicious behaviour when visiting homes of his then friend.

“When we approached Mr. Guiseppe for a statement. It started to get suspicious”, the FBI Detective detailed, “Firstly, he tried to hide behind the fact the ‘Duke’ was simply attending a straight forward birthday party. But it was when we suggested that Mr Guiseppe was garnished with enough chilli flakes, to make even the most  battle-hardened Falklands veteran break out in a sweat, did the Pizza’s lawyers get immediately involved”

Buckingham Palace said it would not be commenting further.

And equally a legal representative for Mr S. Giuseppe have also stonewalled any approach to further clarify the movements of the ‘HRH’ on that night in 2001 when it is alleged that the then 41-year-old met up with a then 17-year-old Virginia Roberts, at the then 39-year-old Ghislaine Maxwell’s house, rather than spend a quiet night in admiring the Princesses amateurish colouring-in efforts from the earlier Pizza Express ‘Fun Pack’.

Prosecutors and the FBI have contacted the Duke’s lawyers but have received no reply, said US Attorney Geoffrey Berman.

“It’s disappointing, the case is going cold. We had some really good Italian bread based informers in the early days of the investigation”, Mr. Finklestein went on to describe, “but their testimonies had to be rejected once one of them started to self-identify as a calzone and the most credible accurate witness turned out to be an Hawaiian Pizza from Pizza Hut. Do you have any idea how hard it would be to get a fruit-themed pizza evidence through the Supreme Court, for extradition purposes?”

Convicted US sex offender Epstein took his own life in a jail cell in August, aged 66, while awaiting trial on sex trafficking and conspiracy charges.

“We only hope that Mr Giuseppe doesn’t take the same path”, Detective Finklestein pleaded, “But seeing as he will be appearing in 436 UK Pizza Express outlets daily rather than under 24/7 surveillance in a  US high-security jail, we think he’ll be safe”

  •   
  •  
  •  
  •  
  •  
  •  
  •  

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.