Piers Morgan and Jacob-Rees Mogg clash in TV Twat-Off

Entertainment, Art & Culture, Popular Right Now, UK Politics
Piers Morgan and Jacob-Rees Mogg clash in Twat-Off

Piers Morgan and Jacob Rees-Mogg clashed in a Twat-Off to determine which of the two is the biggest twat.

The spat came after Morgan criticised the governments response to Covid-19 and Rees-Mogg told people not to listen to him.

Mr Rees-Mogg described Morgan as a ‘loathsome oaf’ but said that ‘despite all his efforts’ Morgan would never ‘be able to take me on in the twat stakes.’ He said the GMB presenter is only hated because of things he’s done to ‘socially distance himself from anyone and everyone that displays traits of humanity.’ The MP said Mr Morgan ‘will never be despised just because he’s a posh useless twat stealing a living as a caricature Tory.’

Defending his record of twatness, the TV presenter said that while Rees-Mogg may have voted in the Commons to increase poverty and protect the interests of rich people as a whole, he has never stooped so low as to use phone-hacking or doctored photos to subvert police investigations and to bring misery, hardship and risk to specific individuals and families.

Rees-Mogg though challenged this, citing his abysmal comments on Grenfell victims as ‘a level of twatness that Piers Morgan couldn’t hope to achieve.’ Morgan responded by saying that ‘just in the last few months’ he’s managed to offend vegans, the Chinese and The Duchess of Sussex, as well as being accused of sexism towards colleagues.

The spat came to an end when Rees-Mogg insisted that his stance on gay marriage makes him the bigger twat as he basically disagrees with the whole country on that one. He said he’s spent his time in the limelight of UK politics lounging around in parliament and mocking the poor, needy and vulnerable. And he said he’s found that he courts just as much hate for being out of the public eye as he does when he’s in it –  a trait which he said was unlikely to the same in Morgan who he said would ‘do the world a favour’ by going into hiding.

With the two men separated, the Twat-Off came at an end and talk turned to which of them is indeed the bigger twat. A YouGov poll indicated that 100% of people agree both are twats but that the nation is 50/50 on which one is the bigger twat.

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