“No female Bond” say Producers, as “52% of the UK would call her a drunk slag”

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No female Bond say Producers, as 52% of the UK would call her a drunk slag

The producers of the James Bond films have ruled out making the character female after Daniel Craig’s departure.

They say they can’t be seen to be progressive by having a female James Bond as 52% of the UK would just call her a drunk slag.

Producer Barbara Broccoli said Bond could be any colour, but will always be male.

Bond fan, Gammon and Twitter misogyny enforcer, Barabus Valentine, 52, said, “ A woman who drinks excessively, then drives under the influence before sleeping around that much is nothing but an irresponsible slut.

“She probably wouldn’t be a very good spy anyway, as she’d be in the chemist every single day getting morning after pills.”

“Anyway, whoever heard of a female spy? The idea is simply preposterous.

“No, no, no! I think you’ll find it’s not misogyny if it’s a fact! FACT!

The upcoming film will see Lashana Lynch play a female 00 agent after Bond has left active service.

All gammons were shocked at the news, every single one of them saying, “Good old Jimmy Bond should be a bloke, running around shooting baddies and doing man things like having unprotected sex with loads of women he’s just met and drinking loads immediately before driving everywhere fast!”

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