Nefarious clowns holding power drills, axes and hammers revealed to be Boeing employees going to night shift

Business, UK Politics, World News
Nefarious clowns holding power drills, axes and hammers revealed to be Boeing employees going to night shift

Historic internal emails have surfaced at aeroplane manufacturer Boeing describing the company’s 737Max aircraft as ‘designed by clowns’

It turns out this was a literal description as the company attempted to help out clowns who are struggling in an ailing industry.

As such, all those past reports you heard of nefarious clowns standing around holding potential weapons have actually been revealed to be Boeing employees on their way to the night shift.

With the downturn in the clowning industry, many have gratefully accepted a job working nights on their new ‘cutting edge’ aircraft, as Boeing attempt to assist the overly make-uped individuals with massive shoes.

A clown, who wishes to remain anonymous, Bubbles, said, “Me and hundreds of other clowns sat around having a right laugh whilst designing this plane. Loads of innovative suggestions such as confetti flying out of the engines, different sized windows all down the sides and whoopee cushions on all the seats.

“Also if you beeped the horn, all the wheels and wings fell off.

“We have to thank Boeing for giving this equal opportunity to the clowning industry: there wasn’t an aeronautical engineer in sight!”

Michael Gove has taken notes that this is what can be achieved without the use of experts.

An anonymous employee wrote in an exchange of instant messages in April 2017: “This airplane is designed by clowns who in turn are supervised by monkeys.”

Monkeys have been swift to seek legal advice that they are being besmirched by Boeing’s layer of middle-management and do not wish to be associated with such incompetence, even though they are well known for throwing faeces around.

The planemaker described the communications as “completely unacceptable”.

They have yet to describe their failing plane responsible for the death of hundreds as such.

Boeing said, “These communications do not reflect the company we are and need to be, and they are completely unacceptable.”

It appears they will hunt down and fire someone responsible for emails but not sack anyone in relation to the deaths of almost 350 people.

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