MPs received packages of mysterious white powder, Gove disappointed not to be one of them.

Home Affairs, UK Politics
Michael Gove very much looking forward to no role whatsoever in Boris' Cabinet

A man has admitted to sending hoax white powder to 16 MPs.

Richard Hayes, 40, sent hoax packages to MPs containing a mysterious white powder.

Michael Gove, after hearing about MPs receiving packages of ‘white powder’, became very enthusiastic, telling aides to cancel his afternoon plans.

He then asked his secretary to retrieve a small mirror and some Steely Dan albums.

Police used specialist chemical, biological, radiological and nuclear officers to deal with every incident.

Gove was informed that these packages may not be the ‘white powder’ he was thinking of, but could be something far more dangerous.
According to sources he didn’t care, telling his advisors:
“Listen, if it’s one type of powder, then I get to party. If it’s another, then at least I won’t have to deal with this Brexit shit anymore”

The powder was found to be a mixture of flour, protein powder and bicarbonate of soda, with the intent to create “a belief of a noxious substance”.

Gove however was not informed of this, as he had left his office.
He had become despondent when it was clear that he would not be receiving a package.
A depressed Gove told his aides to cancel his appointments, before grabbing some cash and leaving.
His reason for leaving was that he “had to go meet a man in a nightclub toilet.”


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