Michael Goves “delighted” to receive two Tory Leadership ballot papers

UK Politics
Michael Gove very much looking forward to no role whatsoever in Boris' Cabinet

Some Conservative members have been issued with more than one ballot paper to vote for the next party leader and prime minister.

“Michael Gove and myself are absolutely delighted to receive the correct number of ballot papers”, Michael Gove beamed, “This is a real recognition of the fantastic work, Michael and I, are performing in the party, bringing real issues to the forefront of modern Conservatism”, a Michael Gove said.

One party insider estimated that more than a thousand voters could be affected.

“Whilst initially shocking, I am proud to say that we,  have been a shining beacon of example to those loyal Tory Party members, who wish to follow in the footsteps of Michael Gove and myself.  Indeed, I have always admired Michael Gove’s ability to hold two opinions, on any issue,  simultaneously”, stated Michael Gove.

Some members have received two ballot papers, in some cases because members live and work in different constituencies and may have joined local Conservative Associations in both areas.

“Whilst others, such as Michael Gove and I, have received two ballot papers in order that we can fully (and completely) express our positions”, the Environment Secretaries explained

People who have changed their name, after marriage for example, may also have been affected.

“In my view, but surprisingly not Michaels’s, changing either my name, or indeed Michael Gove’s would not do anything to enhance the image of ‘Brand Gove'”, countered Michael Gove, “I can reassure my loyal supporters that I shall be maintaining consistent identities within the party. As will Michael Gove”, added Michael Gove

Duplicate ballot papers which have been issued to the same person at the same address.

“and how delighted Michael and I were to receive the invitation to fully exercise our franchise, when the letters arrived on the doormat at ‘Gove Towers'”, the MPs for Surrey Heath stated

The ballot holds clear instructions that members voting more than once will be expelled

“And contrary  to Michael Gove,  I would fully support the party in expelling Michael Gove”, said Michael Gove, “However, Michael Gove has much to offer the Tory Party, so I would also support his continued inclusion”


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