Matt Hancock scrapped after NHS snipers hit target

UK Politics
Matt Hancock scrapped after NHS snipers hit target

Health secretary Matt Hancock has suggested that landmark NHS targets could be scrapped following the health service’s worst A&E waiting times since records began.

Following the announcement, it is understood the NHS undertook a hit on the health secretary to remind the public at large why targets are so important.

It is understood the addition of a para-military wing of the NHS was made after Jeremy Hunt was made health secretary, NHS senior management claimed “We couldn’t risk something like this happening again.”

When reached for comment, a number 10 spokesman said “Obviously we didn’t rush into giving the kill order, the Prime Minister takes the decision to execute one of his cabinet members very seriously.”

“However, we really needed a win on the NHS and this was one target we could actually meet with relatively little investment.”

“Are you really going to miss him?”

At press time, it is understood network rail has formed their own black ops team in response to the government’s handling of Northern rail.

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