Man who failed to become an MP seven times now reckons he’s the Prime Minister

Popular Right Now, UK Politics
Farage outside downing street

The Brexit Party has been delighted to come top of the poll in the UK’s European elections.

And no-one has been enjoying the victory more than party leader Nigel Farage, who seems to have got slightly carried away with the result.

Mr Farage is now behaving as if he’s the Prime Minister. This is despite the fact he’s tried to become an MP seven times, and failed on each occasion.

The ardent Brexiteer has been going around the newsrooms of the nation’s broadcasters, telling everyone who will listen that he and his party should be at the top table of British politics involved in making crucial decisions.

And Mr Farage has been quick to dismiss criticism that the Brexit Party is an inward looking organisation with no real policies.

“Actually, we are just about to release our manifesto,” he said. “It’s packed with great ideas from across the world, such as introducing a version of the Indian caste system to the UK.

“Obviously I’m not going to reveal full details at this early stage. Suffice to say if you’re white, live in Surrey, have private health insurance and an annual income above £100,000 I don’t think there’ll be much to worry about.

“The voters have spoken and they want us to deliver Brexit. I will walk to the ends of the Earth to ensure that happens. Not literally of course, I’ve got a group of supporters to do that sort of footslogging thing for me. I’ll be with them in spirit.”

Brexit Party supporter Jim Johnson said he completely endorsed everything Mr Farage stood for.

Mr Johnson boomed enthusiastically: “Nigel is a man of the people and tells it like it is.

“I can’t wait for us to get out of the Common Market and start trading with the foreigners on WTF terms.

“Europe needs us more than we need them. We’ll have our cake and eat it, because we hold all the aces. What can possibly go wrong?”


1 thought on “Man who failed to become an MP seven times now reckons he’s the Prime Minister

  1. You’ll need a popular manifesto to get anywhere in a general election, that means sliding scale taxation system without offshore havens, and amendment of all Socialism systems to social and free market capitalism?
    And a name to follow on after BrExit is done: Midland Party perhaps, infers centre ground thinking?
    Better still, compromise to bring the Leave and Remain sides together – suspend BrExit for 5 years (not cancel due to majority Leave vote), and redesign EU away from Federal United States trend towards EC trading market format + our own C’mwealth model.
    And you standing for next EU President, to ensure the redesign!!
    Failing any progress, Leave with no Deal in 2025?

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