Love them or hate them, scientists may have finally solved the great mystery of the universe’s dark matter.

Science and Tech

A new theory suggests that 95 percent of the universe is filled with a weird “dark fluid.”

It’s called Marmite.

Oxford scientist Dr James Farnes has proposed a new theory that may put to bed one of the greatest mysteries of the cosmos.

Just why are people are so divided over it’s taste.

Whilst some scientist are very enthusiastic over this dark liquid theory, others are very sceptical.

Which just adds to the evidence it’s Marmite.

Farnes’ theory, published in the scientific journal Astronomy and Astrophysics, attempts to explain the bizarre properties of the 95 per cent of the universe previously considered ‘missing’.

Was it missing, though? Or had it just been left in a parallel universe only slightly different to our own? A universe in which a family of prehistoric creatures live in Loch Ness, Boris Johnson is Mayor of Atlantis, Amazon delivers presents with drones flown by intelligent piglet pilots  and everyone has happily accepted Theresa May’s Brexit Deal.

According to Dr Farnes – no.

But what does he know?

Simon Paul Miller

Written By: Simon Paul Miller

Writer for The News Dump, The Rhyming Detective podcast, Big Finish (Doctor Who Short Trips audio story 'Seven To One') and BBC Radio's Newsjack, Newsjack Unplugged & Breaking The News.
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