“Just lie back and think of England” Johnson tells England as he roughly shafts England’s international reputation

UK Politics
Just lie back and think of England Johnson tells England as he roughly shafts England's international reputation

Boris Johnson prepares to visit Berlin the but Prime Minister struggles to defend his ‘collaboration’ jibe

However, it is understood that aides at Number 10 are optimistic in their efforts to help the gaffe prone Johnson avoid any embarrassing encounters on his European trip.

“We managed to knock the Hitler moustache he was planning on wearing out of his hand, I don’t think he’s managed to sneak any of the others past us…”

They added “A couple of us chastised him after walking in on him practising that Fawlty Towers Nazi walk. He denied it of course, claiming he was just stretching his legs.”

“We heard him doing the voice though…”

Johnson might have a frosty reception in Berlin as the chair of German foreign affairs committee announced “New rhetoric coming out of Westminster has not changed Germany’s position on Brexit: as long as there are no solutions to the border problem on the table.”

It is understood that in the run up to his meeting with German Chancellor Angela Merkel, Johnson has also been briefed on which racial slurs are acceptable to use and which will cause an outright international scandal.

When asked for comment, German parliamentary insiders wistfully asked “Whatever happened to that panicky, grey looking woman who looked like an android covered in human skin with an android’s face plastered on top of the human skin? At least she could brush her hair properly.”

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