US President Donald Trump has defended his threat to target Iranian cultural sites if the country were to follow through with retaliation measures for the killing of commander Qassem Soleimani.
However, the Iranian leadership led by Iran’s supreme leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, is struggling to match Donald Trump’s threat in finding 52 equivalent sites of cultural significance in the US.
On Sunday, Iran had warned Trump that bombing cultural heritage “is a war crime” after he threatened to attack 52 Iranian sites.
“and also gives the Iranian Government a huge headache. Just where do we find 52 sites of cultural significance in the US?”, an Iranian spokes for the Supreme Leader stated, “Especially when the US destroyed pretty much all of the cultural lands, traditions and heritage of its own First Nation People”
When Iran retaliates, it is thought most likely to follow Soleimani’s own indirect tactics: so-called asymmetric warfare.
“Just where do find equivalent cultural sites in the US?”, the Majles representative went onto add, “I mean we’ve got carpets that are older than the United States. “The best our think tank could come with was daring dawn raid to replace the hillside HOLLYWOOD sign with one reading INFIDELS, but that was ruled out as President Hassan Rouhani is huge fan of ‘Friends’. Especially ‘The One where Chandler overthrows Western Imperial Democracy'”
President Trump said the targets represented 52 Americans who were held hostage in Iran for more than a year from late 1979 after they were taken from the US embassy in Tehran.
And will also conveniently be accompanied by a set of playing cards to mimic the pack issued in 2003 ‘Most Wanted Iraqis’.
“It will be beautiful”, the increasingly unstable US President declared, “52 playing cards available through The Trump Organisation at just $49.99. Destroy the set! Trump That!”