With Brexit done the government have said they’re keen to move on to other unnecessary and expensive ways to waste public money.
Sajid Javid has decided to throw his support behind HS2 after studying Treasury analysis.
He said he was unable to give an accurate cost for the project as he ‘ran out of fingers and toes’ but estimated it at ‘somewhere in the region of above £20.00.’
A leaked report suggested the project could cost almost double the official 2015 estimate of £56bn.
But Mr Javid said, ‘a lot has changed’ since that estimate, and with the Tories having increased the public debt to record levels ‘another £56bn will hardly be noticeable anymore.’
HS2 has long been a controversial project.
With pretty much everyone who isn’t due to make an absolute mint out of it, describing at as ‘bloody ridiculous.’
Senior government figures say cancelling the project at this stage would be a ‘credibility issue’.
Speaking on behalf of Downing Street, civil servant Bob Bobson said, ‘This government is highly respected and needs to be careful not to do or say anything that will make it look like just a bunch of incompetent idiots in suits.’
Mr Bobson was then given a round of applause, a box of Quality Street and an afternoon off after winning the bet that he could deliver the message with a straight face.’