Fucking scary clown films will ruin our livelihood say even fucking scarier professional clowns

Entertainment, Art & Culture, World News
Fucking scary clown films will ruin our livelihood say even fucking scarier professional clowns

Professional clowns are finding horror films like IT anything but funny and they have come out and said that thanks to creepy big screen characters like Pennywise and the new Joker, parents and children are going to be put off booking their services.

And nothing to do with the fact that children’s tastes are slightly more sophisticated these days than watching a middle-aged man in make-up pull a bunch of fake flowers from his arse.

One nightmare inducing children’s entertainer said that “Psycho clowns are a threat to the profession”. But of course

nNot all clowns are psycho’s some are there to help as one New Zealand man proved when he was called into a work meeting and feared the worst. So he hired an emotional support clown to accompany him.  

A spokesperson for the PR company said “And you wonder why we sacked the fucking idiot?”

During the important meeting the clown noisily made balloon animals of unicorns and poodles.

The man was sacked during the meeting but admitted that having Joe the Clown sitting with him lightened the mood considerably.

When we asked if the demise in popularity of clowns might be down to the introduction of fun things like trampoline parties, video game parties and science workshop parties rather than middle aged men in terrifying make up and a wig with the ‘ability’ to juggle 3 balls and laugh at his own jokes which are only slightly older than him. It’s not exactly going to win Britain’s Got Talent is it?

The clown took umbrage and stormed back to his car which then exploded and the doors fell off. Undeterred he shuffled off, still holding the steering wheel, dragging his arse along the floor like a dog with worms.

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