Boris Johnson has carried out a limited reshuffle of his government.
With ex MP Nicky Morgan being appointed Minister For The Hell Of It.
Minister For The Hell of It is a newly created post for dead-behind-the-eyes former MPs who have sold their soul. The role involves assisting the PM in avoiding scrutiny, defending the party against outbreaks of truth and using a tongue and groove system to wipe Boris Johnson’s bum.
Ms Morgan is taking a peerage and will sit as a cabinet minister in the Lords. The decision has been criticised by opposition parties.
But the Prime Minister defended his decision saying, ‘The election result surprised me as much as anybody else and, although I’ve got 365 MPs to choose from, for most of them their only redeeming feature is that they’re not Jeremy Corbyn.’ He went on to praise Ms Morgan for her ‘unwavering commitment to do anything to boost her career’ and her ‘complete lack of morals which will be greatly missed by her constituents.’
During the election campaign, Ms Morgan appeared on ITV to talk about the Conservative pledge to increase the number of nurses in the NHS.
She was humiliated in the interview as she tried to lie her way out of the awkward questioning but forgot that the original lie had been told by bullshitter-in-chief, Boris who once again came up smelling of roses after refusing to be interviewed.
Ms Morgan was also sent on BBC’s Have I Got News For You last week.
The Prime Minister managed to convince her that it really doesn’t matter how much of an arse you make of yourself on the show, there always a chance you’ll get a top job. And for the first time in living memory, Boris Johnson delivered on a promise by giving Ms Morgan a life peerage, a cabinet position and bugger all accountability.