Donald Trump’s poodle has spoken for the first time and admitted that he has instructed lawyers…
…after Chuka Umunna claimed Boris Johnson will become Donald Trump’s poodle after Brexit.
The poodle was quoted as saying “Boris will not become Donald Trump’s poodle. I am Donald Trump’s poodle. Has he got hair like me? No. Does he like going for walkies? No. Does he drag his arse along the floor when it itches? Maybe. I’d be surprised if he doesn’t to be honest.
The Liberal Democrats spokesman on Foreign affairs claims that Mr Johnson will become more reliant on the US president it they retain power. He went on to say “Leave the EU and the UK under Johnson will become President Trump’s Poodle.” But, Donald Trump’s poodle was angry at the tone of the speech.
“Why bring me into it? What have I done? I’m a good boy. If Chuka came in here right now I would bite him in the nuts. How dare he.”
Chuka declined to comment, although to be fair, we didn’t actually ask him to.