Dominic Cummings to use extra MPs time off in order to pursue his goal of trying to kill Harry Potter.

Entertainment, Art & Culture, UK Politics
Dominic Cummings to use extra MPs time off in order to pursue his goal of trying to kill Harry Potter

MPs will get an extra month away from the Commons this year compared to 2019.

This is great news for Dominic Cummings who, when not being a Chief Special Adviser to the Prime Minister, is obsessed with his goal of killing famed boy Wizard Harry Potter.

Cummings, lord of the death eaters, has been trying to kill Mr Potter for nearly 20 years, after learning of a prophecy that stated the boy would destroy him.

Cummings attacked an infant Potter one night, after getting pissed during a student party at Oxford. His attack, however, was deflected by the power of a Mother’s love, and he was torn from his physical form, and spent over a decade lingering in the plane betwixt death, along with a brief spell in post-Soviet Russia.
He re-emerged years later, manifesting himself purely through his contempt for the EU, and becoming one of the chief architects of Brexit.
This however, has taken up a considerable amount of his time, and he has been unable to devote himself to killing Mr Potter, instead sending a handful of ‘pureblood’ Conservatives out on his behalf.

They were unable to find the boy, so decided to implement countrywide austerity measures and welfare cuts, hoping that Potter would be among the victims of these.

Cummings is certain that Potter is the final key standing in the way of defeating the EU and establishing Brexit rule across the country, and will be devoting much more time this year to eradicating him.
He could attack Potter at the wizarding school of Hogwarts, but refuses to step foot in it, as even though it’s purely for wizards, it does not charge tuition and is not a private school.

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