Emergency services were called to Slough last night,
after residents realised they live in Slough,
The town was hit by high winds,
as even God said the town was beyond hope.
A large section of a roof was blown off one block of flats,
with one resident saying he’s not surprised as the whole place is a ‘shit hole’,
People were advised to avoid the area,
as experts warned that prolonged exposure to Slough is detrimental to mental health.
A large police cordon is in place.
Thames Valley Police issued a statement assuring Britons that Slough is not the future of a post-Brexit Britain and there is some hope.
Slough Borough Council said they are aware of the incident,
adding they ‘couldn’t give a shit’ as none of them actually live there.
Local MP Tan Dhesi called it a ‘major incident’ and asked people to ‘stay away’,
as he’s got to show his face in Parliament and doesn’t really want people to see the ‘pile of shite’ that he represents.
Slough’s population is one of the most ethnically diverse in the country.
Which is why the government couldn’t give a fuck about it.
With emergency services flooding to the area to assist local residents a government spokesman said, ‘fuck ‘em, they live in Slough. What did they expect?’