Coronavirus symptoms now confirmed to manifest in Arseholes

Popular Right Now, UK Politics
No one at all surprised Boris probably fucked floppy-haired blonde narcissist

Prime Minister Boris Johnson has tested positive for coronavirus.

This has led the nation’s scientists to confirm that coronavirus symptoms can now infect more body parts than previously thought.

Symptoms can be found primarily in the chest and lungs, but this is now proof that symptoms can also manifest in arseholes, no matter the size.

The Prime Minister is self-isolating in Downing Street

He has been advised to carry on his usual routine of staying away from the common British public.

Mr Johnson’s spokesman said all No 10 staff “will of course remain two metres apart from him at all times if they were to have any contact”.

This will not effect the Prime Minister’s personal life however, as he has plenty of experience socially distancing himself from his children.

No 10 has previously confirmed that if the PM couldn’t work, Foreign Secretary Dominic Raab would take over

They have refused to clarify on what the concept of ‘work’ would actually entail though, as they’ve been unable to provide solid examples for the past couple of months.


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