China now almost as toxic as Brexit Britain, warns World Health Organization

UK Politics
China now almost as toxic as Brexit Britain, warns World Health Organization

The Chinese government has confirmed that the coronavirus has now reached every region of the country’s mainland.

The spread of the virus in China has created an atmosphere almost as harmful and virulent as that in a UK divided by Brexit, according to a statement from the World Health Organization.

“The Chinese are learning the same lessons as Britons have over the last four years – some people are noxious and best avoided,” said a WHO spokesman.

“At least the risk of catching the coronavirus can be mitigated with face masks and frequent hand-washing. Such actions are largely ineffective in the face of increasingly brazen right wing views.

“And of course there are no branches of Wetherspoons in China which helps restrict the spread of all sorts of poisonous substances.

“We hope that emergency quarantine measures will limit China’s unhealthy environment to sub-UK levels.”

The virus has now spread to 15 other countries.

A policy of isolationism may stop the virus spreading from mainland China in a way we can only pray it will stop nationalistic hatred spreading throughout Europe from its source in Little England. 

The death toll has now risen to 170.

If coronavirus deaths can be contained within the hundreds rather than thousands then it’s unlikely the disease will take as many lives as the harsh economic impact of Brexit eventually will.

UK citizens have been advised to avoid all non-essential travel to China.

Foreign Secretary Dominic Raab recently cancelled his own trip to Beijing – not through fears for his own safety but because the Chinese government said their country was already quite toxic enough, thank you very much.

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