In a statement The Queen said, ‘Henceforth, the talented and handsome Prince William, Duke of Cambridge, second heir to the throne, dedicated air ambulance pilot and all round top bloke, will be known as “Favourite Grandson” and will be entitled to wealth and riches worthy of someone who isn’t a turncoat and a traitor to his royal roots.’
The Duke and Duchess of Sussex are to step back from Royal duties with almost immediate effect In reaction, the weekend children’s publication, ‘The Mail on Sunday’ has immediately thrown in £500,000 to the restoration program of Big Ben in order that its readers can celebrate Megxit in style, with a full round of the Westminster Chimes to coincide with the moment The Duke of Sussex’s plane touching down in Canada.
No worries though for Diamond Geezer Harry Boy he’s already pimp..er touting his wife to Disney for voice overs of reboots of The Non-Aristocats..The Prince and The Pauper, plus the one all Hollywood is talking about the blockbuster of a movie made at a staggering cost of £2.4million… The Princess and The Frog-more Cottage.
UK police have blocked a legal bid to trace Prince Andrew’s bodyguards’ movements on the night he allegedly had sex with an underage girl. The police have defended accusations of being ‘lazy’ or even covering up for the Prince, by stating that it is standard protocol to hang all sensitive documents by a thin piece of string over a garbage can fire.