Science and Tech

Early heatwave may be delayed due to Brexit red-tape

Early heatwave may be delayed due to Brexit red-tape

March 25, 2019

Weather experts are predicting a three-month heatwave next month that could see temperatures climb to 26 degrees as a warm front drifts in from Africa.
But, in order for it get to the UK it must pass over Northern Europe which could spell a disaster as it is held up in Brexit red-tape.

“We can literally make any old bollocks up and you’ll believe us” says astronomist

“We can literally make any old bollocks up and you’ll believe us” says astronomist.

February 21, 2019

“An asteroid the size of Big Ben is expected to skim past earth later on tonight” says a spokesperson for NASA”  But, equally I could tell you that a dozen space monkeys were going to cartwheel passed Jupiter and you’d be none the wiser.” He went on to tell The NewsDump “It’s because I have a massive telescope and you don’t, so I can make any old shit up and you have no choice but to believe me.”