“I would have thought the only people Cameron would be talking to would be a bottle of single malt, the business end of a shotgun and whoever he paid to ghost write his suicide note” said everyone, everywhere.
Where 25-year-old Cecilia Manduca works there is a “pay self-assessment process”. Put simply, the workers there decide how much they are worth and should be paid. The House of Commons also introduced this system six months ago and there is now a ninety-year waiting list for jobs. Cleaner Anna Moldova, who had been on ten-pounds per hour, currently earns 200k per annum.
UK coastguards have today announced that they have intercepted a number of cancers attempting to cross the channel in search of a ‘better and longer life’ in the United Kingdom. It follows this morning’s news that the UK is lagging behind its continental counterparts when it comes to patient survival rates.
“To even suggest the human body just ‘stops’ working without food is just the latest in an increasingly desperate series of lies foisted on the Great British public. And for what? I’ll tell you what. So a group of un-elected bureaucrats in Brussels can cling to the idea that food easily gaining entry in the UK without punishingly inefficient border checks is somehow a good idea.”