Marie’s philosophy is the ‘KonMar’ method – where you get rid of an object if looking at it doesn’t ‘spark joy’ The result has been catastrophic for some as they have thrown away some really quite important medicines; when seeing them, they don’t feel joy – just a sad reminder of their health problems.
“We all laughed at that photo of the seal with the eel in his nose, didn’t we? But he knew what he was doing,” shouted one man, as he waded further into the water with eyes like disco balls and an eel dangling from each nostril. He was later witnessed screaming, “I’m the king of the world!” and pounding his chest like a gorilla, before eventually disappearing beneath the water – another victim of London’s pervasive eel culture.
Many existing apps are enhanced by the phone’s supple form. When the user opens Tinder, the FlexPai will literally bend over backwards to demonstrate positions from the Karma Sutra. Some testers reported the resulting display to be so arousing in its own right that Tinder was no longer ‘required’…whatever that means.
If you and your partner still live together, getting a divorce often depends on the judge’s interpretation of unreasonable behaviour. Acceptable reasons should include’ admitting you gave them socks as a present for twenty consecutive years or more’, and ‘Not watching ‘Strictly Come Dancing’ together’.
“This is a massive sum of money and we want it to have a huge impact on the lives of other people we know and love as well as on our future too,” said Mrs Conroy, 52. “But that cow Emily Ferguson next door, who refused to chip in for five new fence panels after Storm Doris blew them down a couple of years ago will be getting precisely fuck all.”
Last year she got her nanny to wrap their presents, used staff to decorate her two homes, paid a man to decorate her windows with spray snow and paid someone to wrap garlands around the staircase. She does concede she may have gone too far when she hired J K Rowling to write her children’s thank you letters.