The stars, including former footballer Ian Wright and reality TV personality Caitlyn Jenner say they’ve fully prepared themselves for a few weeks of monotony and being fed bollocks. A sentiment echoed by the entire UK as it gears up for 87th general election this decade.
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“I’m delighted to be taking up this new challenge,” crowed Dawes, “And promise that under my stewardship fuck all will happen till I retire to the House of Lords with a huge pension. My track record speaks for itself. For example, look at housing… fuck all done with me at the helm. I see no reason why I shouldn’t be able to maintain my strategy of apathy and lethargy with a fatter salary and sitting in a different chair.”