Britons will be charged €7 every 3 years to visit the EU. The same cost as a piss-poor pint in a London pub.

Politics, Popular Right Now, Travel

As a direct result of Brexit, Britons will have to pay €7 for a document allowing them to travel to EU countries. That document will last for 3 years.

Or to put it another way, Britons having the freedom to visit countries on the continent for three years will carry the same financial burden as drinking a pint of warm piss-poor lager in a London pub for three minutes.

It is called an ETIAS (European Travel Information and Authorization System) and although not launched yet, is expected to come into force in 2021.

By which point most Britons will be too heavily engaged in fighting with friends and families over the last tin of mushy peas in the local convenience store and struggling to remember what electricity used to be like to take advantage of what is actually pretty good value for money.

The EU says the ETIAS system will “undergo a detailed security check of each applicant”.

Presumably to ensure that those who voted for Brexit solely because they wanted to stop ‘bloody foreigners’ entering the UK are punished harshly for their stupidity.

EU officials will ask for the education and work experience of applicants, as well as background questions about criminal records and medical conditions.

The checks will prioritise the granting of ETIAS passes to those who actually embrace different cultures, and not to fifty year old racists from Bradford who voted leave yet still insist on flying to Spain every summer to get sunburnt and risk heart attacks by eating full English breakfasts at a beach cafe every day.

Pete Redfern

Written By: Pete Redfern

Pete has written for various satire sites and hails from Berkshire, where he lives with his wife and two children. Despite looking like a hooligan, Pete has little interest in either football or violence, and instead spends his spare time trying to make people laugh on the internet, mostly unsuccessfully.
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