Britain will face shortages of fuel, food, and medicine if it leaves the European Union without a transition deal. This is according to leaked official documents reported by the Sunday Times.
Cabinet ministers have contested the reports though, and Boris Johnson has said there is nothing to worry about, following the announcement of an unrelated ‘Eat the unemployed’ campaign.
The Sunday Times said these predictions,compiled by the Cabinet Office, set out the most likely aftershocks of a no-deal Brexit.
The Prime Minister ignored these reports, saying he was too busy enacting his new campaign.
Under Johnson’s new scheme, it would now be legal to eat people who have been unemployed for longer than 6 months.
“We are working with the DWP to enact a scheme to help deal with long term unemployment. Anybody who is still unemployed after several months will be fair game for poachers, hunters, marauders or chain restaurants.”
Energy minister Kwasi Kwarteng has said that Britain would be fully prepared for an Oct. 31 no-deal exit.
“There is nothing to worry about. Prime Minister Jonhson is making great strides towards improving this country. Look at his ‘eat the unemployed’ scheme; it’s a terrific motivation to get people into work and put taxes elsewhere. And if it happens to also provide the country with a large quantity of meat, then that’s just an added bonus.”