The move by the appliance maker means two executives will relocate – chief financial officer Jorn Jensen and chief technical officer Martin Bowen. The company had insisted that no jobs will be lost. Although given that Dyson products are manufactured in Malaysia, the only jobs still based in the UK are those of Sir James Dyson’s housekeeper – an elderly lady on minimum wage called Mabel – and a guard dog called Winston.
CERN has published its ideas for a £20bn successor to the Large Hadron Collider, under the official name of Future Circular Collider (FCC). Which admittedly doesn’t sound half as cool as some of the codename used internally: the ‘Massive F***-Off Hadron Collider’. Or indeed the nicknames used by the team informally: Look at my ring’, ‘The Party-Cool Physics Zone’ and the ‘Look at this, Who’s The Sad Nerd Now, Bitches?’ project.
Trump then continued his rambling speech by talking about the expensive cars that the Secret Service use and the wheels on those vehicles. No-one is quite sure how long he spoke for, as something more relevant and interesting began happening while the President was speaking. A full report on that paint drying will be published shortly.
The technology show has in the past displayed virtual reality porn and sex robots for men, so the inclusion of a sex toy for women is a perfectly fair concept, right? Wrong, because apparently the only thing that matters when it comes to new technology is the sexual pleasure of thirty-five year old male nerds who still live with their mums.
The boat contained six life jackets, personal possessions and a milk carton cut to be used to bail out water. Presumably it was the milk carton that gave the dinghy a tactical edge over a 1700 tonne gunship armed with machine guns and a fifty-strong crew that had been deployed specifically to tackle the ‘migrant crisis’.
Cameron’s team may have accidentally let his commons pass expire, but they’re still in his good books – because they’ve managed to ensure his membership at the local abattoir has stayed in good standing. He treats that place like a library. Pops in when the missus is away, sees if there is something he’d like to dive into, takes it home, ploughs through it and then returns it. And then repeat ad-nauseum. Emphasis on the nauseum.