Toy Story 4 is due in cinemas on June 21st. It is currently unclear whether this deadline will be met, extended, or missed entirely.
In the tank, staying afloat but only just – the venomous Sting May. She appears to have a cast-iron stomach, which explains how she can consume vast quantities of mouldy jam without repercussion. Unfortunately for a creature so prone to making herself look stupid, she appears unable to swallow her pride.
In a leaked video, the heavily tattooed and globally feared Canadian popstar-slash-warlord is seen at his fortress in the Rocky mountains, discussing the designs with his business partner, an actual bear: “There’s Taylor”, he says, indicating one of the many, many T-shirts decorated with human skin that surround his throne of swords: “Not so Swift now, are ya? That’s what you get for dissin’ the Biebs, yo!”
Theresa May presented her new Brexit plan to the House – attack the bank, kill the goblins and steal the treasure. Jeremy Corbyn strongly opposed ‘the slaughter of innocent creatures for financial gain’, but was shouted down by Conservatives who reminded him that that’s the exact wording of their manifesto.