Theresa May is to meet the 1922 executive to offer 'clear understanding' of the rough outline of the draft timetable of her eventual departure from number 10, possibly

Andrea Leadsom resigns. “Oh, THAT’s how you do it!” says Theresa May. “It’s that easy?!”

May 23, 2019

Mrs Leadsom resigned because she said the new Brexit plan has, “elements I cannot support, that aren’t Brexit.” The PM appeared puzzled by this until senior advisors explained that for some people, acting in a way at odds with their fundamental beliefs about democracy causes them to feel uncomfortable, and then they take action for example, resigning their political position.

After his years of talking to plants, Prince Charles regarded as best qualified to explain Global Warming to vegetable

After his years of talking to plants, Prince Charles regarded as best qualified to explain Global Warming to vegetable.

May 22, 2019

The Prince is passionate about environmentalism and is expected to give a seminar to Mr. Trump to aid in his education. Subjects to be covered include, ‘water is wet’, ‘ice is cold’, ‘the Earth is getting warmer’, and ‘warm ice melts.’ A spokesman for Prince Charles said, ‘Though these can be difficult concepts to grasp, the Prince is committed to leading President Trump step by step through these key points, so that he might better understand what is happening to the world around him.

USA declares national emergency over tech spying- Trump nude photos would pose threat to public health

USA declares national emergency over tech spying: Trump nude photos would pose threat to public health

May 16, 2019

“I can’t think of a current bigger threat to the well-being of the American people than if those images become publicly available.” When asked if he was referring to nude photos of the President, the spokesman said, “I couldn’t possible comment on the nature of the allegedly extremely graphic, multi-pose, sometimes close-up sometimes panoramic images,” while winking furiously.