Alex Salmond’s lawyers change approach and buy Weinstein’s Zimmer-frame

UK Politics
Alex Salmond’s lawyers change approach and buy Weinstein’s Zimmer-frame

The trial of the former First Minister of Scotland continued this week at Edinburgh’s High Court as another three women gave evidence alleging that they were sexually assaulted by him.

His legal team have decided it’s time to change their approach. They are now going for the sympathy vote and have made an audacious approach to buy Harvey Weinstein’s Zimmer frame.

Mr Salmond has pled not guilty to a further 13 charges of sexual assault against nine other women. The alleged offences are all said to have happened when Mr Salmond was serving as Scotland’s first minister and the leader of the SNP. However, his team have decided to up the ante.

The former First Minister claimed he would never up his aunty that it was all banter, a harmless bit of slap and tickle.

Woman J said she lay on the ground some distance from Mr Salmond because she did not want to anger him. The witness alleged that they were both working on the speech when “out of the blue” he asked: “Have you seen that zombie movie?”

The case is more Carry on First Minster or Benny Hill than serious Weinstein-Esque predator.

He says he is innocent of all the allegations against him, which are said to have happened while he was serving as Scotland’s first minister and the SNP leader.

He claims he was working on a 1970-s non-PC styled sitcom called Crumpet!!!

  •   
  •  
  •  
  •  
  •  
  •  
  •  

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.