London to get £3.5 billion ‘Brexitland’ theme park funded by taxpayers.
December 8, 2019People of all ages will be able to visit, although younger visitors will be charged double, and their extra fee will go towards OAPs getting in for free, even though they'll spend way less time there and it'll be worse than they expected it to be.
Shit Stirrer prepares to rename Brexit Party, ready to jump on the next Bandwagon he sees
December 9, 2019The Brexit Party will change its name after the UK leaves the European Union, leader Nigel Farage has announced. He said, ‘it’s important the name reflects the will of the British people’ and so, post-Brexit we will most likely be called ‘a bunch of gullible racist wankers’.
After the year she’s had, Queens speech to feature her drinking whiskey in silence for half an hour.
December 9, 2019Due to the absolute 'fuck up' this year has been, the Queen will not be delivering a prepared speech. She will instead be smoking, and drinking a bottle of Jack Daniels in silence. This is expected to last around half an hour, or until the Queen finishes her bottle of Jack, whichever comes first.
Shit Stirrer prepares to rename Brexit Party, ready to jump on the next Bandwagon he sees
December 9, 2019The Brexit Party will change its name after the UK leaves the European Union, leader Nigel Farage has announced. He said, ‘it’s important the name reflects the will of the British people’ and so, post-Brexit we will most likely be called ‘a bunch of gullible racist wankers’.
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“Message me babes!” says concerned Putin after humiliated Trump rants “Tu muny snakes at Nato”
December 6, 2019As the White House now has more leaks than a urology surgery for pensioners, the News Dump was given exclusive access to WhatsApp correspondence between the aggrieved Trump and his shadowy puppet master Vladimir Putin.
Trump calls Trudeau ‘two faced’ after failing to grasp the concept of face paint
December 5, 2019Donald Trump has called Justin Trudeau ‘two faced’ and refused to hold a press conference with the Canadian PM. The announcement came after US aides spent the best part of two days trying to explain the concept of face paint to the president.
Trump determined to buy a keepsake from his trip to Britain: the NHS
December 3, 2019
Fears for Trump’s Pardoned Turkeys After He Names One Jamal Khashoggi
November 28, 2019
London to get £3.5 billion ‘Brexitland’ theme park funded by taxpayers.
December 8, 2019People of all ages will be able to visit, although younger visitors will be charged double, and their extra fee will go towards OAPs getting in for free, even though...
Corbyn to guest star on both Strictly and X-Factor in desperate attempt to gain last minute votes
December 6, 2019In a last ditch attempt to catch the Tories, Jeremy Corbyn will be undertaking a whirlwind tour of television studios as he tries to spice up his image and win...
Polar Bear Spotted With “Get Brexit Done” sprayed on its side
December 4, 2019Footage shared on social media in Russia of a polar bear with "T-34" spray-painted in black on its side has alarmed experts. This is the second such curious sighting this week, after earlier eye witness accounts of a Polar Bear with the increasingly tired phrase "Get Brexit Done" sprayed on its flank
